The Perky Poet (Nanda Marchant) with ‘The Respondent’

20 Nov 2023 | ICG News & Announcements

ICG member Nanda Marchant regularly pens poems which many of our members enjoy. Here’s her latest one.



A lady collared me one day outside my local church

She wanted willing volunteers to do market research ‘It’s just a chance to air your views, for which you get some cash’

With money tight I thought: ‘Why not, I might give this a bash’

So I went on a database but didn’t hear for ages

This wouldn’t be the magic wand to supplement my wages

They had some strange criteria, like needing organ donors

But then one day the call went out: ‘We’re seeking kitten owners Your cat must try some different foods, then you provide your views

It’s all done on the internet’ – well here’s one I could choose

I opened up with diligence the tins that came by post

And monitored which fishy tastes my kitten sniffed the most

How much he ate, how much he left, so many forms to tick

It would have all been worth it, but the food made Tiddles sick

‘It’s not your fault’ I cooed and gave a reassuring hug

‘But judging by that whiff of fish I’ll need a brand new rug’

I’m now awaiting eagerly for them to reimburse I lack the funds to buy it, but the smell is getting worse

I’ve called to check, I’ve emailed in, but they are not attentive

I did my bit, I gave my views, so where is my incentive?

A month on, I’m no better off, I’ve just that ghastly smell So will I do it all again? No, they can go to hell!